Imposter Syndrome: Feeling Like You Are Not Good Enough
“Who else usually feels like they are not the best of themselves, but other people think they are amazing at what they do?”
My friend and I got new jobs recently, we talked about our achievements these past few months and it was eye-opening. We started by talking about how we felt like we weren’t doing enough, maybe we don’t really qualify for the jobs, and so on. We didn’t start by talking about how — we are amazing at what we do, we deserve it and we work hard. In the end, we acknowledged these things in ourselves because they are there. We just didn’t see it.
Imposter syndrome is described as self-doubt of intellect, skills, or accomplishments. It blinds you from seeing the things you are capable of. I think my imposter syndrome comes from wanting more for myself. When I unlock a new achievement, I feel that is not enough to prove that I am good enough, I must reach a certain height to get there. It isn’t how it works, but it is how my thoughts work with me.
When I submit my work to an editor and it’s time to get feedback on the edits I feel like I have done a terrible job writing the article. Then I get the feedback and it’s just a few corrections on my choice of words, and I am like, “So, I am this good?”
While Imposter syndrome makes you want to do more all the time, most times it makes you do nothing because you feel you are not good enough to take on a certain level of challenge. It limits you, your choices, your reach, you prefer to believe you can’t do it rather than try.
It also stems from believing only the negative feedback you get, and not acknowledging the positive ones you receive. I was always doing this. I prefer to believe the negative because “Oh, that’s what I am supposed to work on if I want to be better”. I didn’t care about those positive feedbacks, I am good at them already, there is no need to dwell on that”. If you do this too, you are not alone. I am not there yet but I am fighting imposter syndrome with all I have got. Here is how I have been dealing with imposter syndrome and with time, I will overcome it.
I use affirmations a lot especially when I feel low and need to stay positive. My wallpaper is a picture with an affirmation on it, so I say it to myself whenever I pick up my phone to do something or I am anxious. It helps, the first few times may not look like it does, but affirmations can help you stay positive.
I say these affirmations to myself:
“I deserve to be in this position and to succeed”
“I am proud of my achievements and the progress I have made”
“I am worthy of respect and recognition”
“I am not defined by my mistakes, but by my ability to learn from them”
“I am enough, just as I am”
Practicing self-awareness has allowed me to understand myself more. Know yourself, be yourself, and acknowledge who you are, what you can do, what you do, and every single moment that you have. Self-awareness comes when you realize these things, only then will you accept yourself. Self-acceptance enables you to fight imposter syndrome because when you know yourself, it’s easy not to doubt yourself anymore.
Posting achievements on social media has become the norm for many people. While it is good, it can be a source for comparisons among a lot of people. I have learned not to compare myself with anyone on social media, or anyone who does almost the same thing I do just because they are where I want to be. I don’t know the hard work they put in to get there. So instead of comparing and being hard on myself. I celebrate them, learn from them, and put in work to get things done too. Because I can, you can too.
Other things I learned to do are; Celebrating myself and others, Getting rid of my anxiety instead of accommodating it, documenting my achievements, journaling, and seeking help when I need it.
Fighting imposter syndrome is hard, take it one step at a time. I am doing just that and before the end of the year, I hope to have gotten rid of this imposter telling me that I am not good enough. You can do it too, follow my practices and let me know how it went for you. #sayingnotoimpostersyndrome